Kelly To The Rescue!
Nat and Ethan recently vacationed up in Michigan with Nat’s family. Because I was unable to join them, and so that I wasn’t here alone, Kelly took off from work the same week and booked a flight to Houston.
I was feeling well enough the Thursday evening she arrived to drive out and pick her up from the airport. Although I was very excited to see Kelly, I admit I was feeling a little nervous as I stood waiting for her in Terminal A. The only reason I could come up with for feeling uneasy is that Kelly would now be able to judge for herself if what I’d relayed through phone conversations and e-mail really matched what she’d see for herself. I even remember text-messaging her once I knew her plane had landed because I felt I should “warn” her about who she was going to see. On an intellectual level I knew that the way I looked (like I had cancer) would not matter to her, but emotionally I felt like seeing me in person for the first time might scare her or cause her to be more worried.
By the time Kelly made her way down the hallway and through the security gate though, my anxiety melted away. There she was with arms open wide and a huge smile covering her face. And once we were close enough, our embrace said it all. It didn’t matter what was going on or what I looked like. We were together, and that was all that mattered.
Our time during the week Kelly was here was pretty laid back. We made a point of walking every morning and napping almost every afternoon. We ventured out for lunch a few days, and other days we settled for what was in the refrigerator. Kelly also helped me organize a few things (in particular, my brain) because she noticed early on that I was all over the board and revved.
I didn’t deny my mental state (due to chemo brain and/or self-diagnosed ADD) because I was feeling sort of nutty myself. I knew that my heightened state was most likely tied to a number of to-do piles and lists laying about. Trying to remember to attend to these tasks caused extra clutter in my head, so given that I’ve already got a lot on my mind, with cancer, treatment, etc., I knew I needed to take advantage of Kelly’s offer to help me sort through my to-dos. By applying gentle pressure (“I can’t wait until I can see those piles gone from the kitchen table,” or “We’re not doing anything else until we get these items checked off your list), Kelly was successful in pushing me through the lists and piles I had created.
The best part of Kelly’s visit was that we had a lot of time to talk. Whether it was while we were walking, sitting together for lunch, driving around town or organizing, we covered all our usual topics – marriage, weight gain/loss, home improvement, work and family. In addition, cancer and how we were coping made its way into our conversations. Kelly said a number of times that she was really glad, and relieved, that she had decided to come and stay with me. She admitted that she hadn’t really, until she got to Houston, thought all the way through what was happening with me, and by being in the same space made a huge difference for her own emotional well-being. I reassured her that I wanted to talk candidly about our feelings about my cancer and that seemed to help her work through her own feelings.
Our time together was really beneficial for both of us. Not only did Kelly have a chance to help me out when I needed it, but she used our time together to process her own experience related to my breast cancer. On top of that, we were able to spend the precious sister-to-sister time we love so much, and for that, I know we are both happy.
Love, Lisa
p.s. In case you were wondering - I’ve had a number of uninterrupted nights of sleep since I last wrote! Waking up, even though it’s been somewhere between 4:00 a.m. and 4:45 a.m., feels much like it did when I awoke that one night after surgery able to move my right arm around. Remember? It's an exhilarating feeling to wake rested!!!
-MESSAGES-
Hot Tuesday Just want to say "HI". Happy you had a great time with Kelly. Having hot weather, which I do not like.. Keep up the good work. A. J.
An answered prayer I am so glad to hear about your sleep. I have prayed that for maybe just one night, you would just be allowed to sleep. It seems He has provided more than I had asked. You are such an inspiration and thank you so much for letting me into your personal trial. You will never know just how many people you are touching on a daily basis. When I was reading my Bible this morning, I opened it and saw where I had made a note about a particular scripture and now by reading your message I know why God pointed it out to me. What a blessing you are:)
Romans 5:4 "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that sufferings produces perseverance, perseverance produces character; and character, hope." King James Version
:) Hi Lisa! Just a quick hello. I'm so happy you had some time with Kelly; sisters are such a wonderful blessing!!! My mom is coming to pick me up so we can run some errands, so I must be going. Just wanted to send ***(((HUGS)))*** and let you know prayers are being lifted for you! XOXO, M.
Lisa Lisa My thoughts have been on your well being - hope you could feel it. Just got back from San Francisco for Read 180 - I'll bore you with the details in person (though I did NOT find it the slightest bit boring.) I hope to catch you at school soon, and I hope to catch you feeling great. I've missed you this summer...more than usual...See you soon. Love, D.