It's Going To Be A Marathon
I coupled training for the Houston marathon and working on my Master’s. Kelly – my marathon coach - was relentless about keeping me focused on the “goal.” Coach Millenbah always seemed to catch me when my mental and physical tail was dragging. In an oh-too-chipper voice, she’d shout into the telephone receiver, “Lisa! What’s our motto???” She wouldn’t let me off the hook until she actually heard me say, “Keep my eye on the goal.” Once I had summoned the energy to say those words to her, she’d laugh, and I could go back to melting into a puddle on the floor.
Well, here I am at yet another life experience that challenges the mind and body. I’m glad to have my coach back at my side along with an incredible cheering section. I don’t know if I will ever be able to find enough words to let you all know how much I appreciate your loving thoughts and tremendous support.
I look forward to checking the CarePages when I get up in the morning, and when I need an extra boost during the day, I gravitate to the website. By the time the day is winding down, I find great comfort in being able to put my thoughts down into an entry. It serves as a way of staying connected.
Today was a rather quiet day – one that I really needed. My pain management has been a bit touch and go since yesterday – I’ve hovered around a 3 or 4 which means that I’ve “felt” pain to a noticeable degree – not horrible but not complete relief either.
My pain meds were altered after the fiasco with my digestive tract, so I’m still in the process of phasing over to the new drug regime. Hopefully by tomorrow with the addition of one extra pill during mid-day, I’ll be in considerably better shape. Plus, I’ll have three days in since surgery, so the healing process should be well on its way.
I’ll actually be able to see the spot where the port-a-cath was placed tomorrow morning when I’m allowed to remove the dressing that covers the surgical site. I keep hoping (considering the size of the dressing about 6"x6") that the holes from surgery aren’t also going to be HUGE. I’ll let you know. Until tomorrow... Love, Lisa
-MESSAGES-
Double dulce de leche latte, anyone? Thought you might like one before your next trip to "Targeeeee" excuse my French. Swiss I can do, French noway!!! I never thought I would ever say it was too cold here for me but-----------who turned off the darn heat? BRRRRRR! We are getting company from the "Old" country on Monday and they said the kids would be happy in the swimming pool. Ain't gonna happen. I (that's ME) have to get in that water to set the steps and I'm afraid my body would shrivel up and all my clothes would be too big. Can't let that happen. Ok get a good night's sleep; that's an order!! Love you bunches, A.P.
I agree! I agree with D.! Now I find myself checking to see if you've posted an update. It is so wonderful to read your words, knowing how strong you are to pull yourself up every day and move forward. You are such an example of strength!!! Today turned cooler...me, being from Texas, I call it COLD! I didn't like it one bit! I am ready for summer. I went to my cousin's birthday party and then to Target. I thought of you - it is probably therapeutic for you to shop, it seems to me like a return to normalcy, at least for a moment. I hope your pain number goes DOWN DOWN DOWN and by tomorrow you are at a 1 or 2 at most. You are an inspiration!!! Have a wonderful evening. HUGE BIG ((((HUGS)))) :) SO glad I'm not the only carepages-addict.
Target? Ok, when my mom was very ill, we measured her pain tolerance by whether or not she could get her hair done. My mom comes from the generation of women who go to the beauty shop once a week no matter what. Somehow, getting her hair done was always a good sign to the rest of us. Your sign is your trips to Target! M. and I just got back from the Texas Motor Speedway in Ft. Worth. It was absolutely freezing, and we were so ill-prepared. How did everyone else get the message to bring gloves, ear muffs, and winter jackets? Anyway, this morning when I woke up I was desperate for a computer and jogged, well you know me, I walked fast, to the hotel lobby to get on the computer to see how you were and read your update. D. and I are ready to visit you when you're ready. Remember that mean vegetarian taco soup I make? Say the word, I'm there. I will pray for you and your healing daily. Love, C.
Mattresses???? Ok, I am just loving Kelly and her idea for a new motto, but I'm just not sure saying "I'm going to the mattresses" is a good idea. Seems to me that can be dangerously misconstrued.......!!! (Hahaha) On another note, Lisa, I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better. At first, I read your message and thought it said your bandages were 6 FEET by 6 FEET..hahaha ...that would definitely be too big! Sounds to me like they just ran out of anything smaller and decided to put the bigger bandages to work...probably because you flipped off your meat-loving anesthesiologist. They all got together and said, "She's not going to eat red meat? We'll show her. Bring out the big boys!" On another note (still on that damned evil doctor) I told my seniors the story about how you flipped off the doctor. Because they are 17 and 18 years old and fairly rebellious, I thought they'd love that story. Unfortunately, I was the only one laughing. I stopped and looked around and their faces all showed shock. I thought, "Is it possible I have offended teenagers???" However, that wasn't the case. One timidly raised his hand and said, "We're still stuck on the part of the story where your close friend has breast cancer." (Who knew teenagers were so sensitive?) I guess they were pretty amazed that I could be joking about it, so I told them you specifically wanted me to tell funny stories! I don't think they get it, but I do hope they remember the story of my good friend Lisa who could find many ways to laugh in the face of cancer. You are my hero! I love you, C.
Another try at a message Dear Lisa, A half-composed message just vanished from this space, so I'll start over and will watch my fingers on this one. I'm writing from Portland, Maine on a hotel computer after reading the carepages sent over the last week while I've been away. This is to assure you that old friends, old folks like me, are among the many friends and family members of all ages, from many places, who are thinking about you constantly and figuratively circling our wagons around you. My mother was a positive, can-do person like you whose breast cancer success story has helped many people "reach for recovery." She had to have both breasts removed -- two radical mastectomies ("radical" means they removed affected lymph glands as well as both breasts), and to say she lived life to the fullest every day thereafter would be the understatement of the year! I'll keep in touch with Prue and Ami about you after I get home tomorrow -- if I do manage to fly home. We're warned that a major storm is about to slam the north Atlantic coast Sunday with sleet, snow, driving rain, and high winds. Goodnight and sweet dreams to you. Along with so many others, my arms are around you, too. xxx A.V.
My Cancer-Free Friend, Lisa, I know that it's going to happen, so that is how I'm going to think of you...CANCER FREE! It's a healthier twist on the "fake it until you make it" motto! I had to laugh at D.'s desperation to check your carepage. I've been out of pocket all day, and I can so relate!!!! It was a great day...had a little bit of survival guilt...I went to see Wicked and I so wanted you to be there! I ended up taking K....my daughter from another mother! We had cheap seats up in the nosebleed section. It was so hard to see the actors clearly. It was like their faces were a blob. At the beginning of the 2nd act, we eyed a box that was not occupied. K. and I excused ourselves and snuck over to the box. I felt like Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman" when she went to see the opera. I lost myself in the whole experience. The faces went from being blobs to being real and alive and energetic. I could explain things to K. and share the whole experience with her and know that I wasn't bothering people around us. This carepage is like the theater box. It keeps us closer to you so that we can feel your pain, your joy...your every moment...bowels and all!!!! I know how much you love quiet, so I'm glad you had that kind of day. You are loved! A million hugs! M.